Angola Prison Rodeo

Angola is the only maximum-security prison in the Louisiana State Penitentiary system, and is the largest maximum-security facility in the country.  The prisoners there are the worst in the state - in terms of the crimes they committed and the time they have to serve.  It's a working prison, situated on 18,000 acres in the long part of the state's "L" - south of the border with Mississippi (as opposed to Arkansas).

The inmates maintain the prison facilities, work the fields with no mechanized tools (including growing all of the produce fed to the men housed there), tend to the animals (including the free-range cattle which are sold at the end of the season to make money for the prison, having been deemed too high-quality for the prisoners to eat), and generally keep the place running.

All of which creates an interesting intellectual dichotomy in the abstract, that becomes much more strange and real when you find yourself on prison grounds, interacting with actual prisoners, and realizing how many more of them than there are of you - even on rodeo day.  They primarily maintain and operate the very place that holds them captive.  They keep it running, so that it can keep them locked up. But if they did not, they would not have food or water.  So they have to.

But six days each year - one weekend in April, and every Sunday in October - the routine falls away, and it's time for the Rodeo and Hobby Fair.

In their free time, the prisoners can work at crafts - painting, woodworking, leatherworking, metalworking, gardening - and they have the opportunity to sell their wares to rodeo-goers.  In some cases, you get to meet the prisoners who did the work.  If they have a record of at least 10 years with no disciplinary incidents, they are allowed to stand at their booth and sell, just like any artist at any art show anywhere.  If they do not meet that requirement, they have to stay in "the cage," which is a fenced enclosure surrounding some of the fair buildings.  You can talk to them, but they are not allowed to roam about freely.  Friends of theirs who have the requisite clean record work the booths for them.  Presumably some artists are not even allowed in the cage.

If you find an item you want to buy, you let the artist or booth worker know.  He writes you a ticket which you take to the cashier for payment.  The prisoners, even the ones working the food tents, are not allowed to have any involvement in the payment process.  (Each food tent, run by different interest groups inside the prison, has at least one non-prisoner to handle the payments.)  Once you've paid for your item at the cashier, you return to the booth with your receipt to collect your purchase.  For all the people (and there are a lot of them) who buy hand-crafted furniture, there are a couple of loading areas.  You go get your car, and the prisoners will carry the furniture to the loading area for you.  It's not clear (nor did I ask) what percentage of each purchase goes to the prisoner's commissary account and what percentage goes towards prison operations.

Oh, and the bands.  Angola has some pretty great bands, and they get to play for a real crowd on rodeo day.

Then the rodeo starts.  There are introductions, a performance by the Angola Rough Riders, and some opening ceremonies.  Unfortunately, the sound system left a little something to be desired, and S and I felt like we were listening to Charlie Brown's teacher for most of it.  We missed much of what the emcee said and the jokes of the rodeo clowns (who are professionals, not prisoners).

The prisoners, though, were where the interesting stuff was.  There was traditional bull riding, bareback horses, and the like.  Not many made it the full eight seconds, although one managed to stay on his horse for 17 seconds.  One also dislocated his shoulder, and (surprisingly) only one had to get carried off the arena floor on a backboard.  The only female participants, besides the woman who carried the flag during the national anthem, were the barrel racers, since that requires actual talent and not just testosterone and a total lack of anything more interesting to do.

As the rodeo progressed, the more unusual events began.

There's calf wrestling (not to be confused with the traditional calf roping).  In calf wrestling, two prisoners are given the task of wrestling a calf off its feet.  About 20 pairs of prisoners gave it a go, and a third or so were successful.

There are the chariot races, where a prisoner rides what is essentially a flattened cardboard box, and he's towed behind one of the rodeo cowboys who runs his horse the length of the arena, circles a barrel, and runs back.  It's like riding an inner tube being towed behind a speedboat, except the prisoners are being towed through mud and all manner of animal excrement, trying to stay on their "chariot" while holding a pitcher full of water in one hand.  It appeared that the objective was two-fold: (1) stay on, and (2) if you succeeded at #1, have more water left in your pitcher than the other few guys who also stayed on.

There was the milking contest, where three guys get teamed up, with the goal being, as it sounds, to extract some milk into a cup, from an immensely uncooperative animal.  About eight teams gave it a try - one succeeded.  And I just have to say, the one that did only managed it because one of the biggest dudes I have ever seen just walked up to the cow (apparently not caring at all that the cow was bucking and tossing its head around), wrapped his arms around the cow's neck, clasping his hands in front of the cow's chest, and drove the cow's face down into the mud.  It was impressive.

There was convict poker.  A table and four chairs are set up outside the chute. A prisoner sits in each chair, as though playing poker. A bull is released from the chute.  After that, it's pretty simple: the last man with his butt in the plastic chair wins.  They did this twice at our rodeo.  The first go-around, the bull charged straight out and mowed down three of the poker players, so the other guy won by default.  After getting all the cowboys out there to clean up the pieces of table and chair, they reset with new furniture.  The second bull was not quite so tidy about everything, and did a lot of dancing and prancing, knocking over each player in turn, but revisiting each of them to toss them out of the way.  The winner was the guy who, despite being knocked down, tossed, and stepped on, held tight to the seat of his plastic chair after everyone else had let go.

There's prisoner pinball, which was a favorite of both of ours.  The cowboys scatter hula hoops around the arena.  A prisoner stands in each one, and a bull is released from the chute.  The last man still standing in his hula hoop wins.

The final and craziest game was Guts and Glory.  A poker chip has a hole drilled in the middle of it, and it is put on a cord which is tied between a very angry bull's horns.  All the prisoners are released into the arena, and the bull follows.  Whichever prisoner manages to grab the poker chip from between the bull's eyes wins.  No one did.

After the conclusion of the rodeo, the food stalls and booths are open for another hour or so, for additional purchases and pickup of purchased items, and then everyone begins the long trip home.  (Having said that, though, I also have to say that it's clear this is not the prison's first rodeo - so to speak. Their traffic management is excellent, and most concert venues could take a page out of their book.)

By this point, you're probably wondering why there are no pictures of this craziness.  Unfortunately but not unexpectedly, no cell phones, cameras, or other recording equipment are allowed on the rodeo grounds - everything has to be locked in your car.  However, there are professional photographers/videographers there, so there are videos available on YouTube (search "Angola Prison Rodeo"), which are well worth watching.  If you have some more time, there is a documentary called The Farm, available in its entirety, which gives more of the story of the prison itself.  (There are also some episodes of a show on Animal Planet -- really?  yes, really -- and all kinds of other stuff about Angola that are available online.)  Long story short, though, I'm sorry I don't have any pictures for you, aside from a snap of a souvenir:

One strange observation: the Angola Prison Rodeo is the only place on the planet where you will find that many rednecks - that many boots and that much camouflage - and nary a Bud or Coors Light in sight.